how to get rid off your annoying ex. [ v.2 ]

11.00 pm,
It was late at night and he still in his office. He was staring at the monitor
on his desk, while the ads from numerous porn sites keep popping out on the
desktop. Oh! You’re going to owe me big time for this!

A man with a guilty face was standing next to him, watching him anxiously.

I know. Just get rid off those pop ups will you?

Our dear friend sighed. Actually, it was no problem at all. But the fact that
his colleague has used his PC to browse the porn sites was almost unforgivable.

“Why do you have to browse from my desk?”

“I’m just looking for something err… artsy…”

stuff? From the porn sites?”

“Err… It’s
for my girlfriend…”

 “Hey! I thought you’re married?”


The quarrel paused when the phone suddenly rang.

They both looked at each other with a puzzled face.

“Pick it up… Maybe it’s your wife”

“No way… I called her ten minutes ago and told her that I’m going to be late”
“Then who is it?”

“Duh… it’s
on your desk… Just pick it up and find out!”

He sighed and picked up the phone


“Hi… It’s you all right!” A voice cracked in a delighted tone

“… What do you want?”
He blurted, automatically… It was his ex… again…

“A ‘hi’ back won’t hurt anyone…”

“Ok… Hi…”

“That’s good…”

“How did you get this number?”

“Ah… Your sister told me”

“Oh… I see… What is it then?”
He knew that his little sister have a soft spot
for his ex. The bribe works well

“Ah come on! Can’t you remember?”

“Remember what?”


“What? Look I’m in no mood to play games!”

“Today it’s my birthday…”

“Oh… Happy birthday then. Best of Luck”
Luck… His tongue almost slipped
on the temptation of to replace the ‘L’ with ‘F’

“That’s it? No birthday present or whatsoever?”

“What do you want then?”
He lowered his shoulder, tired of this no good chit-chat…

“Well… Tell you the truth… I still want you come here and fuck me…
Literally…” She said the last word boldly

“I see…”
He almost chuckled. Obviously, she didn’t forget their last chat on
the phone


He paused for a moment, and his eyes stumbled on his monitor.

“Just wait in a few weeks ahead…”
An idea flashed through his mind

“Really? I mean… You’re actually going to… Okay… I…”

“Don’t let me spoil the details… bye!”

He hung up, glanced at his colleague and smirked victoriously.

“What? Who was it?” He looked clueless

“Uh… no one important… Say… You owe me big time didn’t you?”
out an item displayed on the monitor…

“Uh-huh” His friend face was puzzled, but he nodded in approval.

A week later, she received a small package. She opens it up and found an actual
figure of a hand made from solid rubber. The fingers were forming a grip but
middle finger. The middle finger is pointing out, no need to explain what it
means… Along with the figure, she found a note.

“Happy Birthday… It vibrates!”

PS: Battery not included


PS: ini versi keduanya, belum sempet gw edit lagi.

Terus terang,
gw udah nyoba untuk bikin versi ke-3, masih dengan tokoh yg sama cuma
ex-nya aja yang beda… Dan ternyata… gw masih mentok… ada sumbang
ide? ada yg punya annoying ex?

how to get rid off your annoying ex. [ v.1 ]

The cell rang; the voice is
cracking the silence. He woke up feeling dizzy and totally uneasy. He shook his
head, gained his focus and looked at the clock.

“Shit! It’s two in the morning! This better be good…”

He got off his bed and picked his cell on the table. He takes a look at the
name displayed on the screen. It was his ex-girlfriend. He loathed her. He felt
the sudden urge to throw his cell out of the window. But that was senseless.
So, he decided to press the green button and answered the call…



“Hey too…”

“How come… you’re in town and didn’t even gave me a call?”

“Like I should” He shrugged his shoulder

“Okay… So how are you? How’s life?”

“I’m good. Can’t complain”

“Uh-huh? That’s not what I heard…” She said that in weird excitement

“What did you heard?” He started to feel

“Heard that it didn’t work out…”

“What didn’t work out?” He had a hunch on where
this conversation is going to curve

“You and your new girl…” There was a slight satisfaction in her voice

“Never trust gossip” He thought of few names he
could kill later

“Hmm… I know what you need…”

“What do I need?”

“You need SEX… good SEX!” She hissed a clear temptation

“I don’t” He slipped his thumb on the red button
of his cell

“Oh come on… I’ll be good… I’ll make you really happy…” She moaned another

“Did we ever have sex before?” He rubbed the red
button with his thumb. The urge to hang up is getting stronger

“No… never… and it kills me…” She was desperate

“What makes you think… that I would go there at two
in the morning… and do something we never did?”
He was ready to push
the red button

“Oh please… Just drove here… And FUCK me!” She was totally desperate

“OK… FUCK YOU!!” He didn’t have to yell, the tone is bold and clear.
The blatant sarcasm on the last word did the job well.

He pressed the red button and turned his cell off immediately. Few seconds
later, he shook his head and throws himself on the bed. He pulled the blanket,
smirked and gracefully went off to sleep.



Ini sebenernya entry lama gw
di LJ, ada sedikit yg gw edit…